WHAT DO TEENS NEED?

Teenagers may seem distant and aggressive, but they’re secretly quite sensitive. Teens have meaningful connections with parents, teachers and peers. Unfortunately, they are often stopped by fear. They’re figuring out who they are and what their place in the world is. Here are a few suggestions for parents to build a stronger and nicer relationship with their teenage children:

1. Really listen. Don’t try to listen while doing something else. Put your chores aside so your teen knows you are paying attention.

2. Take the long view. Remember, minor problems aren’t big disasters. All incidents provide opportunities to practice good communication. Choose only the most important issues to talk about and reach the strongest results.

3. Make time for being together. Find activities you enjoy doing together and pursue them. If your teen doesn’t want to join you and turns you down, keep trying!

4. Tolerate differences. View your teenager as an individual distinct from you. However, this doesn’t mean you can’t state your opinion if you disagree.

5. Respect your teen’s privacy. Just because your teen wants to keep their door locked, it doesn’t mean they’re doing something you wouldn’t like. But if a behaviour is worrying you, speak up!

6. Create a positive study environment with your teen that includes useful books, music and reminders of their strengths.

7. Celebrate success! Positive feedback goes a long way towards encouraging repeating behaviour. Each success by a family member deserves praise, such as verbal recognition or a special treat like a trip to the movies, a special dessert or posting on the family bulletin board.

There’s no need to worry if your teen is struggling or your relationship feels tense. Small actions like the ones listed above help your teen feel valued and appreciated. Remember, your support means the world to your teen!